NB. Before beginning to read: I am not a Weather-Man, so any of the
following statements I make have no basis in fact, just my findings and
experience.
My whole family get headaches. ‘Nothing unusual there’ I hear you cry! I have a very vivid memory of my Gran coming
over one Sunday for lunch when Laura and I were children. The clouds gathered outside and we were all
out of sorts; my Mother was irritable (this was long before her crazy-menopause
days), my sister and I couldn’t settle and my Gran was very quiet. My Mum declared she had a headache. My Gran declared she did as well. So did I.
So did my sister. What was going
on? My Gran declared “There must be a thunder
storm coming.” We sat down to eat a
little while later. The heavens opened
with a god-almighty thunder crack. Not
long after, the brain-tension was relieved by nothing other than a break in the
weather.
I’ve met a few other people who experience this as well; I
don’t have a clue what causes it (Best guess that I can summon is that it’s to
do with the changes in pressure… But that is a massive guess!) but I do get “weather
headaches”.
Over the last few days, I’ve noticed another common phenomena. A lot of people are struggling to sleep. The children next door are evidence to this –
more specifically, the screaming and shouting of their father on Tuesday night
which scared the living day lights out of me.
I rarely sleep with the curtains closed (it’s too dark if I do) and my
neighbours lights were going off and on all night. There seemed to be more traffic on the
roads. Low and behold when I got into
work the next day, a lot of people were tired due to a lack of sleep.
In my own special world, given how rapid the change has been
from Glorious Summer to Sudden Autumn, I can’t help but wonder if there is some
sort of a pattern here?! A massive
change in the weather and now lots of people cannot sleep? The nights seem to have suddenly drawn in
earlier. My summer quilt is not keeping
me warm enough. It’s cold until nearly
midday. Something’s up in the ether.
More than that though, I’m off my game. I’m pulling my head out of my arse as far as
work is concerned and getting a lot done for being able to see a little better
(head-up-butt is not a good view). As
far as anything else is concerned though, I’m really not firing on all
cylinders. I am thinking very
specifically of one particular area; my writing.
I am quite sure that there ought to be some ebb and flow in
the creative process. I’m almost
positive that dry spells are natural. I’m
positive that I cannot be alone in this experience. I want to write. I have put a “viewing ban” on for the last
two nights to make sure I don’t have the excuse of ‘Oh, but one more episode of
Modern Family couldn’t possibly be a bad thing!’ Yes, Michael. Three episodes later, it is a bad thing. Despite this full intention and commitment to
do some writing… Nothing. Not a
word. Truth be told, the reason I am
writing this blog is because the one and only thing I can think to write about
is how I have nothing to say – the irony, whilst frustrating, is by no means
lost on me.
I had to accept a while ago that writing was going to be
hard whilst I had a full time job; it’s hard to maintain my energy levels, keep
in touch and see people, do a full time job, keep on top of a house and get
enough sleep, as well as writing for a hobby.
It wasn’t something I much liked coming to terms with, but I’ve had
to. Sadly, my winning lottery ticket has
yet to be delivered by the Supernatural-Forces-that-be, so I’m going to need my
job until further notice; my dream of riding off on a fictional-horse to write
is sadly on hold.
The frustration is that even though I have no excuses not to
write – the TV is off, I have eaten, my ironing is done, my house is tidy and I’m
conscious – but I don’t have any inspiration to write.
It’s got to a point of yearning now. I have an ache within me to write or draw or…
something! That too, comes and
goes. Sometimes I can coax it out. Sometimes it comes to find me and monopolises
my mind. All I’ve thought about today is
a) What to have for my dinner and b) Writing something when I get home.
Another convenience of living alone is that I don’t have
real live human people to interact with; my former house mates used to provide very
convenient procrastination when I was avoiding a writing project. Terrible of me to admit, of course, but true nonetheless! I don’t think they minded me bunking off from
my short story to spend time with them… I hope they don’t now that I’ve admitted
that.
Despite the quiet, the comfort, the convenience and the urge
to write… Still nothing. So for this
reason, I have concluded: It’s the weather.
There is no other “rational” (kidding!) reason for this. It must be to do with the drop in temperature
and the nights seeming to arrive sooner that then were, and the cold and my
duvet needing swapping. The sleep-stealing
atmospherics and my writers block are, without (self) doubt inextricably
linked.
My solution to this situation? Well, there is where I’m struggling. I’m writing my blog to vocalise said
frustrations (which makes me feel much better as it happens!). I have made myself a cuppa. The TV is turned off. What do I do now?
 |
| Last nights and tonight's chilled out music choice... |
I’ve been reading a book that’s designed to help reduce
stress… and it’s working so far. I might
do a review of it when I’m done. One of
the things it recommends to reduce stress in any given situation is to accept
things exactly as they are. Yes, I want
to write some fiction. No, I have
nothing fiction-ish to say. And
breathe. Other than that, right now, is
there anything I can do? Well, I guess
there is; trying. Granted, it’s
difficult to try and write anything when I don’t have anything to say. Considering I have nothing to say, this blog
is already more than 1000 words long.
Perhaps there is a fault in my logic.
All of that in mind, it’s just started spitting outside, I
need to put my clean washing away and come up with an idea for a best-selling
novel… Things to do before I sleep!
Any ideas on how you could help? Leave me a comment. Hope this finds you well. Xx
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